Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5

The next morning I wake up to voices coming from the living room. Usually when we have parties, a bunch of people will crash at our place. If I went to bed before the party ended and didn’t know who had stayed over, I would listen to the voices the next morning and try to figure out who was still here. This was easy, because there were only three voices and I knew them very well: My roommate, his girlfriend and my best friend. I drag my ass out of bed and put on a pair of boxers (yeah, I sleep naked), and shuffle out into the living room.

“Well look who’s finally up,” my roommate says.
“Whaddaya mean ‘finally’? It’s only 11:30.”
“Dude, your party last night was AWESOME! I was dancing with that girl with the huge boobs (what’s her name?), then I was dancing with your cousin… It was awesome.”
“Cool man, I’m glad you had a good time. Hey it’s cool if you want to date my cousin.
“Dude, that’s your cousin!”

Me and my best friend decided we were going to go get coffee at my favorite doughnut place around the corner. They’re my favorite because theirs is the only coffee I like, even if the cups are covered with bible quotes. My roommate and his girlfriend stay at the house (probably to have sex, can’t say I blame them), which is good because we have some catching up to do. I throw on some pants, a shirt and my sandals and I’m ready to go. As we’re leaving, I notice that the light is blinking on the answering machine. I figure it’s a message from that weird girl whocalled last night, so I don’t bother checking it yet.

When we get there, I order my usual: a tank of French vanilla iced coffee, lots of cream, lots of sugar and less ice, and he gets milk. He loves milk. I grab a table next to the window, because even though my eyes are still squinty from the light, it’s a little chilly so the sun feels good.

“So were you serious about your cousin? I mean, if we started dating or whatever, I’m not saying we would, but if we did, you’d be cool with it?”
“Why wouldn’t I be? I mean, I know you’re a good guy and you’re not going to intentionally try to fuck her over or be a dick to her, so why wouldn’t I be cool with it?”
“I don’t know, most people are weird about their friends dating family members and whatnot.”
“I don’t care. Hell I’ve told you that you can date any of my exes that you want, and that wouldn’t bother me either. When they’re an ex, they’re an ex. I don’t have any sort of territorial feelings of ownership over them.”
“Speaking of exes, at that party a while back, that was kind of a dick thing that you did.”
“What, I was wasted and happy that she came to the party so I made out with her.”
“Right in front of your ex…”
“Exactly, she’s my ex. It’s not like I was still with her and I cheated on her.”
“She was still really upset though.”
“I’m not saying she wasn’t. I mean, I do feel bad that she saw it, but I wasn’t going to not do it. I didn’t plan for it to happen, it just sort of came together like that and I reacted on instinct.”
“What about that other girl you invited?”
“I didn’t invite her. She was going to a concert that night, so I thought she wouldn’t show up and I would be in the clear. Someone else must have told her about the party and she came afterwards. It’s not my fault she showed up.”
“Yeah, but you were still seeing each other.”
“Not really, I mean we never had ‘the talk’.”
“What talk.”
“You know, the talk that defines the relationship or whatever it is. Where you both lay your cards on the table and see where things stand. That’s usually the point where all of a sudden things change and sometimes start to go downhill. We had just been hanging out every now and then, we hooked up a couple of times and that was it. Plus it was really awkward talking to her, and you know how important talking is to me. I felt like I had to entertain her all the time.”
“Well, you still should have told her that you didn’t want to see her anymore.”
“I told you, we weren’t seeing each other, because that was never established. If we have ‘the talk’ then that establishes something, which means for it to end, ‘we need to talk’. If there was no talk to establish anything, then there doesn’t need to be a talk to un-establish it, because there is nothing to un-establish.”
“I still think it was wrong.”
“It wasn’t wrong. I mean, it was not nice, I’ll give you that, but it wasn’t wrong.”
“So any new girls you’re scoping out, heart-breaker?”
“Very funny, but no, not really.”
“What about that one you made out with at that party, what about her?”
“She gradually lost interest in me once she found out I was a virgin and I wasn’t going to sleep with her.”
“What about doing other stuff?”
“I guess she wasn’t interested in the other stuff. Or maybe it was just me, I don’t know. Whatever.”
“What about that girl with the big boobs? (I keep forgetting her name) She seems like she might be interested in you, but you don’t give her much attention.”
“Nah, she’s not really my type.”
“Whaddaya mean, not your type?”
“She’s got brown eyes.?
“Man you and your rules! What’s the big deal with blue eyes?”
“I’m sorry, I just think brown eyes are boring. I’d much rather look at blue eyes.”
“Blue eyes are the Devil.”
“Oh come on don’t take it personally, I could look into your brown eyes all day, HAHA!”

By this point we are done our coffees and I have to get ready to go to work, so we head back to my house. While he’s gathering his stuff, I go grab a collared shirt that has been hanging up on a hook since I wore it on my last shift. I spray the armpits of the shirt with Febreeze, making it as good as new, put it on and button it.

“Aren’t you gonna tuck that in?”
“Why?”
“Never mind. Hey great party last night, as usual.”
“Thank you, thank you… we aim to please.”

On our way out, I notice the blinking message light again. I want to stall a little more before going to work, so I check it. It was my Mom saying she had to tell me something and to call her when I get a chance.

“She sounded kind of serious. You should call her back.”
“I’m gonna be late as it is. I’ll call her when I get home from work,” I tell him as I hit the erase button.
“See ya later, Dude”
“Later.”